Many women I know date older guys and I’m not just talking a couple of years either – Men in their late 40's and 50's with 20 year olds hanging off them are a fairly common sight….
The Older Man Appeal
So what is it about the appeal of the older man and can you live with the potential drawbacks?
Older men are generally more mature, better established and have a wider life experience. You would hope being a member of the older generation they would also know what they want in a woman (by now) and so will be far more committed to her – although it’s not always the case…
The older man can be richer and not just in money but in substance. He can have a deeper understanding of life and a certain wisdom that only comes with age. A lot of women find this type of package attractive as it fills the provider role that many women seek.
You feel safe with him, secure, he knows who he is and what he wants… He is safe and safety is important! You’re attracted to him and think to yourself, why not?
The Potential Drawbacks Of Dating An Older Man
There are also some drawbacks that come with an older man. For starters his older and the age gap in itself can be a challenge. You may have different interests and you’re groups of friends are different. Imagine dinner parties where his friends in their 50's are mingling with your friends in their 20's – awkward!!
And what about kids? If you are hoping to have a child of your own and your older man has already gone through the process then it may be a problem. Also having a child when he is much older can bring on its own set of challenges.
And what will they think? You know, the sniggering judgmental people out there who just can’t keep their opinions to themselves. Although you may take the attitude of "I don’t care what others think", I still feel that ongoing criticism from people close to you may push your limits.
Play It Smart
When dating an older man I would try to look at his current stage in life and what history (baggage) he comes with. If we are talking men in their 40's – 50's it would be fairly common that they have a few kids, an ex-wife, and a loooong story to tell. You would also need to be aware that many men in this age bracket who date girls in their 20's (after a marriage) are less committal and more in it for the fun. You need to be cautious of this if you’re looking for something more.
The kid’s thing can be an issue, so if you want a child of your own then definitely make sure he is on the same page. People will judge you and some quite harshly. I have heard of best friends and even family members breaking contact with women simply because they didn’t agree with their decision to date an older guy. How tolerant are your family and friends and if they did cut you off, could you handle it?
Your Final Conclusion
Lastly I would look carefully at the personality fit. Do you both have similar interests and can you see yourself growing older with him – keeping in mind that he will most likely pass away long before you do…
I say, “If it seems like a good fit and you could live with the potential drawbacks then go for it!
I hope you found this article on dating an older guy interesting. I would love you to comment on your own thoughts and perhaps share this with your friends.
Thanks for reading.